Soccer Orb: World Cup

Terry saves the day; Crouch stands tall; Gerrard's aim is true

Thu, 15 Jun 2006 18:32:52 GMT

Marcelo Balboa, just after the final whistle: "I'm not impressed with England at all."

Two superb goals by Peter Crouch and Stephen Gerrard in the waning moments of the game are indeed impressive, in my opinion.

And now Eric Wynalda says that England "won ugly." Julie Foudy jumps on the bandwagon by chiming in about England's sup-par performance.

Why am I less critical of England? (I will insist that it is not because I've been an anglophile since the age of seven, that I am the only female--except for The Girl--Manchester United fan in this fair city, or that I live for those live EPL broadcasts each Saturday morning during the season).

It is because I recall that Trinidad & Tobago held steadfast against a fierce onslaught by the Swedes. That their defenders managed to hold England scoreless until the 83rd minute is more of a testament to their abilities than it is to an overall poor effort by the English. Yes, there were missed opportunities by Crouch, Gerrard, Lampard, and Owen; their finishing could have been much better. Yet the team did not go away. Beckham launched a picture-perfect cross to Crouch, who rose to the occasion and broke Shaka's spell. Then Gerrard, undiscouraged by a handful of bad misses, found the goal with a bullet-like shot to secure victory for England.

Interruption: Wynalda just said that Gerrard had "one chance." Huh? That Gerrard and Lampard should "switch positions." Say what?

I believe that I'll be listening to the Spanish-language station for the Sweden-Paraguay game. And I don't speak Spanish.

The lasting impression of this game has little to do with what happened on the pitch. I'm reminded instead of the absurdity of employing announcers who feel the need to overstate the significance of every play, to overanalyze each failed effort to score, to speak simply to fill the airwaves.

And so I will follow my own advice and say no more.

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

Mon, 12 Jun 2006 17:47:05 GMT

words and music by Eric Idle

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...

Small Country, Big Passion

Mon, 12 Jun 2006 15:54:14 GMT

My recently acquired knowledge about Trinidad & Tobago:

1. With a population of only 1.3 million, it's the smallest nation to ever qualify for the World Cup finals.

2. Keeper Shaka Hislop, who had the game of his life against Sweden, is a graduate of Howard University, where he earned a degree in mechanical engineering. I do suspect that his career as a goalkeeper for West Ham United in the English Premier League has been a tad more glamorous than that of an engineer. (My apologies to all the engineers among my readership).

3. Their nickname, Soca Warriors, refers to soca music. According to Wikipedia, this style is a blend of the rhythms and melodies of calypso and Indian music. I was surprised to learn that the song Hot Hot Hot is a well-known example of soca. Remember when the credits are rolling at the end of Bend it Like Beckham and the cast members are featured singing and dancing around to a delightful, Indian-influenced version of this song? Who wouldn't be inspired by all that energy?

4. T & T citizens are known as Trinbagonians.

5. Christopher Columbus himself laid eyes on Trinidad in 1498, according to my copy of The World Almanac (2004). This led to a 300-year stint as a Spanish colony which was then followed by a long period under British rule.

6. I really don't want to make this entry seem too much like something from a history book, but I would like to be fair to Tobago, the smaller of the two Caribbean islands. There were Dutch, French, and English settlements on Tobago. It was held by the Brits for 160 years before becoming independent, along with Trinidad, in 1962.

7. An Englishman called John Lee Lum discovered oil in Trinidad around 1900. This means that at least some Trinbagonians are not displeased by $70/barrel crude oil.

8. Trinidad lies only seven miles from the Venezuelan coast. Or is it thirteen miles, as another source states? No matter--it's closer than I had thought!

9. The country's ethnic composition is described by the CIA World Factbook as follows: Indian (South Asian) 40%; African 37.5%; mixed 20.5%; other & unspecified 2%. As in the United States, those of African heritage are the descendants of enslaved people who were brought to the islands to toil on (sugar) plantations. When slavery was abolished in 1834, East Indians and Chinese came to the island to work as indentured servants.

10. As befits a land that has developed from such diverse influences, Trinidad and Tobago has a long history of celebrating Carnival (aka Mardi Gras), in a style that's all its own.

11. Because I like to end my lists at eleven and on a sweet note, here's a recipe for Toolum. According to cookbook authors Dave DeWitt and Mary Jane Wilan, it is a traditional sweet that's popular in T & T. I haven't tried it, but how bad could anything that's so sugary be? (Apologies to those whose interests don't include cooking and, more importantly, sampling dessert).

What did I know about T & T before Saturday? I knew that it was comprised of two islands, situated in the Caribbean. I knew that it was the native land of Dwight Yorke (former striker for Manchester United), and Ato Boldon (world-class sprinter and Olympic medalist). Many thanks to its football team, the Soca Warriors, for providing such excitement in its upset draw with Sweden in its very first World Cup game.

Why do I love the beautiful game? Because it offers another window from which to catch a glimpse of a very big, beautiful world.

Running a World Cup Office Pool

Wed, 24 May 2006 14:17:26 GMT

I hope to convince a few readers that March should not be the only sanctioned time to run a friendly office pool. Why not piggy-back on college hoops’ success and put together a fun and engrossing contest focusing on the world’s game? It may help foster international goodwill when Jim over in engineering is hanging on every Brazilian set piece and Pam in accounting is praying that the Azzurri defense can protect yet another 1-0 lead.

Now Jim and Pam may not know a whole lot about the beautiful game, but if the format of the pool is structured so that they don’t have to be experts to have a chance, they may be happy to participate. Many pools have fallen flat because either too much knowledge or too much luck is involved. The format I’m about to describe is a nice compromise. Skill in picking teams is rewarded, but the playing field isn’t so slanted that neophytes will shy away. It worked for us in ’98 and ’02. See what you think.

Format

Pick one team from each of the 8 groups. You don’t get to pick all the odds-on favorites, though. In fact, the composition of your picks must be:

2 number 1 seeds
2 number 2 seeds
2 number 3 seeds
2 number 4 seeds

The seeds within each group are determined by the odds of winning outright given by some established sports betting service like William Hill or Ladbroke’s.

Using William Hill’s quoted odds as of today (May 24), the group seeds look like this:

Group Seed Team Odds

A 1 Germany 8/1

A 2 Poland 100/1

A 3 Ecuador 400/1

A 4 Costa Rica 500/1

B 1 England 13/2

B 2 Sweden 40/1

B 3 Paraguay 200/1

B 4 Trinidad & Tobago 1000/1

C 1 Argentina 8/1

C 2 Holland 12/1

C 3 Ivory Coast 50/1

C 4 Serbia & Montenegro 100/1

D 1 Portugal 20/1

D 2 Mexico 50/1

D 3 Iran 500/1

D 4 Angola 750/1

E 1 Italy 8/1

E 2 Czech Republic 40/1

E 3 USA 80/1

E 4 Ghana 250/1

F 1 Brazil 9/4

F 2 Croatia 66/1

F 3 Australia 80/1

F 4 Japan 200/1

G 1 France 12/1

G 2 Switzerland 150/1

G 3 South Korea 200/1

G 4 Togo 500/1

H 1 Spain 12/1

H 2 Ukraine 66/1

H 3 Tunisia 400/1

H 4 Saudi Arabia 750/1

The scoring is as follows: A team gets 2 points for a win and 1 point for a tie. These points are then multiplied by the team’s seed. For example, say the US and Czech Republic battle to a draw. Anyone who has the Czech Republic would get 1 point for the draw times 2 (their seed number) for a total of 2. Those who chose the US among their 8 teams would receive 3 points. A victory for a # 4 seed would net 8 points for anyone clever/lucky enough to have chosen them. The only exception to this scoring system is in the 3^rd place match. For that, the winner is given 1 point times the seed rather than 2.

The points for all 8 of your teams are combined over the course the tournament and the player with the highest total wins.

The cost to play can vary, but $10 per person is an amount that seems to make winners happy without upsetting the losers too much (especially if the winner brings in doughnuts to celebrate). A winner-take-all format is fine or the pot can be split so that other top finishers get a taste.

You may want to introduce a tie-breaker, as well. Ours is to guess the total number of goals scored throughout the tournament. Fours years ago that total was 161.

It’s amazing how avid your co-workers can be when the banter surrounding a well-run pool sparks their interest. Try it and see.

[Submitted by Dr. Statto]